The Re-frame: It’s all in how you choose to look at it!

by | Oct 21, 2016 | 0 comments

Stage 4 in Radical Forgiveness is about re-framing the story. This is where the magic happens.

It’s time to be willing to change the way we look at the story in order to transform it. Turning it from a tragic story into one we wanted to experience, from a soul perspective. We needed to go through it for our soul to grow into who we are now. From our soul’s point of view it was perfect.

Sometimes we will be able to see this and learn our lesson right away but most times we will need to give up the need to know why it happened, surrender to the fact that there is a gift somewhere in the situation that we may or may not ever know. Either is ok.


This is where we start to transform energy and see and feel things differently.  In surrendering we receive our gift and find the real lesson which is love. Divine perfection in what happened is clear and we don’t need to be the victim anymore.

Our painful feelings of resentment, anger and bitterness turn into feelings of gratitude, appreciation and acceptance. We go from fear to love. It’s a beautiful thing.

Once again we do not have to believe any of this, only be willing to entertain that it might be possible. The energy is still being released and the feelings and stories are transformed because our higher self (soul) knows we are at the place of surrender and release.

I can say from a personal perspective and hearing from so many others that this really works! Once you do the re-frame you will feel lighter, happier, more peaceful, hopeful and grateful for those who hurt and betrayed you. You don’t have to be their friend or even like them for this to happen.

Remember, our life is a journey, all parts of it, good and bad are absolutely necessary for our soul’s growth. If a situation keeps coming to the surface it’s a strong indicator that it needs to be addressed. Often times we may think, “That person does not deserve to be forgiven”. That’s not the point.

When we withhold love from someone we are withholding love from our self. Our life force energy is being used to hang on to anger, resentment and bitterness and we have little left for us. It’s tiring and toxic and if we don’t release our pain it will stay in our bodies and eventually it’s coming out! Most likely in illness or disease.


This is what happened to me, in my early 40’s when I was in the thick of it all, I had so many body aches and pains and was continually going to the doctor and physiotherapist.

My body was giving me a ton of warning signs to wake up and pay attention to what needed to be healed. I didn’t listen or even know at that time what I needed to do. I was spiritually asleep and too scared to go deep, I had a lot of stories I was desperately hanging on to!

I was making small changes but I really started to wake up after a major betrayal of a loved one and a colonoscopy where they removed a large pre-cancerous polyp. Cancer was growing inside of me! I felt like I had dodged a bullet and had a new lease on life. I knew had to make big changes and was led to forgiving others and then myself.  I truly believe forgiveness was the catalyst to getting my life back.

If you want to know more about forgiveness and see if you are ready, download my free guide and answer the questions. After that if you want to go further there’s a link to my calendar in the guide, book a time and we can talk it through.


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