Candle in front of many unfocused flames creating a spiritual atmosphere in remembrance of loved ones passed.
2020 was a major upheaval for humanity. We experienced so many changes and uncertainties and we are just beginning to see the truths of our existence.
I felt it was a huge year for growth and seeing our darkness coming to light. We can now see in a whole new perspective our systems are broken, how we live is not sustainable, and complete transparent change is necessary to remedy this.
There have been many lives lost this year and many who are feeling alone and afraid for their future. This will take time to recover from and as we continue to shift and change for the better more pain and suffering will continue. As we feel and shed the old ways, only then can we truly move into our hearts and transform from the old world as we knew it into something new and better for all.
One aspect I find challenging and I know many others do as well, is witnessing others’ pain and not feeling as if I’m able to do much about relieving it.
It really hit me when I learned of three deaths around the holidays, none of them directly affected me but they deeply affected people I love.
I found it difficult to be happy and joyous at this time of the year when I usually am, not just for my loved ones but for all of humanity as we move through the dark night.
I struggled with this, I felt guilty for wanting to be excited and happy, and I dulled it down for others.
Like anyone who is witnessing or experiencing grief and mourning, this is when I question the purpose of life when we have to feel so much pain of losing someone we love.
It feels as if life is not fair or will ever be the same when our loved ones leave such an empty hole, a void that hurts so deeply. It’s true, life will never be the same, we are always changing, that is the one constant we can count on.
Then I received the message, these losses are to remind us of the gift of life, it is so very precious and meant to be lived to the fullest every single moment.
To live and love with all of our hearts, to take good care of ourselves in mind, body, and soul, and to cherish the simple things, say what we feel, tell and show others how much we love them, go for that dream or take that chance on ourselves by doing what we love.
It’s all about LOVE and when we can truly LOVE others, and most importantly LOVE ourselves, we can fill the emptiness with all the gifts life brings. The gifts are all around us, we just have to look.
Mourning and grief are journeys in themselves with no right way or time frame to move through them. I was able to find the message quickly as I was not attached to the ones who passed.
Those who are will need to go through their process before they can get there. We always have choices and we are meant to feel the feelings before we can move through the pain and choose something better.
Personally, I always think of what would the person who has transitioned want? They would not want us to grieve or mourn longer than needed. They would want us to live life fully and make the best of it in their memory.
I know the deeper truth which cannot be understood until we have moved through the grief process. Our passed loved ones have moved on to the next part of their soul’s journey and we are still here fulfilling ours. So life does not end for us even though it feels like that for a while.
Once the pain has subsided we are meant to remember the message from our soul and from the loved ones who left it behind for us to embrace:
Make each day count as if it’s your last because it could be at any moment.
Life is a precious gift we get to relive each day we open our eyes.
Many Blessings to you for a new year of continued growth and remembrance of what’s truly worth our energy to focus on. LOVE
Besides impacting the lives of others to ‘be real and love life’ the most powerful thing about the work I get to do is the reflections of the teachings that come back to me. I always receive some type of wisdom, healing or blessing from the experience, whether it’s a private, group session or a speaking event.
Whatever the message is that I’ve conveyed I am somehow reminded of how it applies to me as well and it guides me towards the next stage of my growth.
Being aware of the subtle messages that are being sent to guide us forward is very empowering.
Last weekend at the Soul Full Day conference, I guided a group of 70 women through a visualization meditation to identify and let go of a fear story holding them back from what they truly wanted for their life, freedom to live their love story.
It was remarkable to witness them releasing the fear and claiming their love stories, seeing and feeling themselves living in the higher potential of their dreams.
This week I’ve been deeply reminded of the fear story that I’ve been carrying, ‘not being well enough to live a fulfilling life because my digestive health is failing’.
This is the same story my grandmother carried, and she died in fear with this story in her which was unconsciously passed on to me, and I accepted it.
For 8 years now I’ve been having various challenges with my digestive health. I’ve seen many different professionals and tried many different remedies and lifestyle changes. Some have worked and some haven’t. Over time things seemed to have mostly settled, then just a month ago the issues flared up again in a bigger way.
This brought up the old fear story for me as I prepare for a trip of a lifetime. I’m going to Egypt on a sacred pilgrimage to the visit the lands and ancient sites with 13 other women. This will be my first trip overseas and I’ve always been fascinated with Egyptian history, never thinking I would get the opportunity to visit until it showed up to me. I was very drawn to go, and decided I was going, even though it felt way outside my ability to be able to take such a trip.
Worries and a wide range of emotions have been coming up for me since these flare ups have been happening. My mind races and makes up stories based in old fears.
What if I am not well enough to fully experience this trip? What if I am stuck in my room and miss the tours, or what if I am not able to digest the food there? All that disappointment and money spent if I might not be able to full experience it.
These stories are very similar to what my grandmother used to tell herself. She was afraid to go far from home, let alone on a plane to another country. Everything centred around her digestive limitations and she was petrified of having an ‘accident’ while out in public. These fear stories debilitated her and she became a hermit and was very lonely in her later years.
I will never forget seeing her in the final days of her life living in fear. I visited her almost every day and seeing her like that was very sad because there wasn’t much I could do other than comfort and reassure her that she would be ok.
What it did do was motivate me to face my own fears and not go down the same path as she did. In this regard, she was a great teacher to me and not long after she transitioned I was divinely guided to take the Radical Forgiveness Master Coach 10 day training in Atlanta.
It was a huge step for me, and again way outside my comfort zone, but in the end it was one of the best things I could have done for myself because it set me on the trajectory of facing my fears, and the journey of living my love story.
I am eternally grateful to be on this path of self-forgiveness and self-acceptance just as I am, and in time I have learned to love myself. I’m still on this healing journey however this year I’ve had some major shifts in this area of my life and feel truly worthy and deserving of this love for myself because I have freedom from the fears.
This is where the synchronicity comes in again.
It just so happens that this Friday, the day I fly to Egypt, is the 9 year anniversary of my grandmother’s passing, and it’s a full moon! You just can’t make these things up. I didn’t realize the mysterious alignment of these dates until just a few weeks ago.
In numerology the number 9 represents endings and completions and I have a strong intuitive feeling that this trip is going to be transformational for me as a new beginning.
The other day when I was dancing my grandmother came to my mind, she was dancing with me, and I know she is leaving me these breadcrumb signs to follow to complete this stage of my journey. I made a promise to her that I was going to end the cycle of fear she carried and commit myself to healing into wholeness.
I have no doubt that this is all happening for me, rather than to me. And unlike my grandmother, I will face my fears and take this trip and I will trust in the divine unfoldment of it all.
I am reminded that everything is always working out for me, even if it doesn’t seem that way and she is cheering me on all along the way.
These are the same phrases I spoke to the women when I was on stage just a few days ago and they echo loudly in my mind as the beautiful blessings of having the freedom to live my love story.
If you would like to experience the guided visualization for yourself listen to the audio recording so you too can be free from your fear story and claim your love story.
In my next blog I will share about my travel adventures so stay tuned, and if you would like to be notified when I share it you can join my email Love Letter list at the bottom of this page.
Until next time… thank you for being here.
Thanks Lorree for shining your light and for sharing this. My Dad passes in the last few hours of 2020. Let us create a great 2021.
You’re so welcome Michael, I’m very sorry to hear about your Dad, may he rest in peace. Yes I’m with you, we will create a great 2021!