For the majority of my life I rarely stepped outside of anything that felt uncomfortable and when I did a lot of anxiety and worry showed up.
That’s what happens when you experience emotional events in your childhood or youth that you can’t process in a healthy way. They stay stuck inside you growing toxic and prevent you from living your life fully.
I am not blaming anyone for these events, they were my destiny and some were decisions I made from fear because I didn’t know any better and was trying to fit in and feel accepted. I trust I was meant to experience every one of these painful experiences and I am at peace with my past knowing all the lessons I learned grew me into who I am now and they are not who I am.
What these lessons have also taught me is to remind myself to ask questions. Why we do the things we do is often not thought about and we are operating on autopilot. If asked why we do what we do we may say, because it’s always been done that way or that’s just the way we do it, or the way it is.
Well I call BS on that if it’s not working or serving you.
There are many things society tells us is ‘normal’ and if we don’t fit into the box then it’s implied there is something ‘wrong’ with us and we need to conform.
Living a Radical Life means to question ways of being, concepts, myself and others with curiosity. I love to dig deeper into the Why of things, it’s my analytical mind always inquiring to learn more and since I’ve paired it with my intuition it’s way more fun to play detective with what’s going on with me, my clients, my take on the world …. and I love finding meaning to life.
Do you remember what we were told when we made a bad decision and our excuse was ‘well everyone else did it so I thought it was a good idea.’ and the response was something like ‘If everyone jumped off a bridge would you?’
I do agree with this theory, why do we do things just because everyone else is doing it?
There’s a human conditioning that compels us to want to fit and be accepted as part of the tribe and we are also conditioned by our parents and society in general that in order to be accepted we must behave certain ways.
So after all of this conditioning it can get pretty confusing and we don’t trust our intuition to guide us to the best decision for us. Instead we listen to others who ‘seem to’ have it all together and can confidently stand in their power and tell us how to live our life … and so many of us believe it ….. well not me anymore.
I’m not saying they are wrong, but maybe they are not right for me. So I question it. I check in and see how it feels in my body. What is my intuition saying? How does it feel? Not what do I think …. I believe we all have this choice, we may have given our power away a long time ago and we don’t trust our self but our inner knowing is still there deep inside.
I say do you, for instance, if getting up at 5am isn’t your thing because your energy is better later in the day then don’t feel bad about it, take what resonates from others successes and leave the rest behind. Find your own sweet spots, play detective with yourself by observing your thoughts, feelings and behaviours, they will tell you a lot if you’re open and paying attention.
Listen to your body, connect with it, it’s your GPS to what support you need.
I now listen with an open mind and heart and set the judgments aside then I make the best decision for me that is coming from a place of personal power and love not fear.
I have faith in myself and the Universe that I will receive what I am meant to experience and I can handle it because it’s all for my growth.
What’s your definition of living a radical life? Do you question and discern what’s right for you?
Please comment, share the link or tag someone who would benefit from reading this message.
Namaste ~ Lorree Appleby
Besides impacting the lives of others to ‘be real and love life’ the most powerful thing about the work I get to do is the reflections of the teachings that come back to me. I always receive some type of wisdom, healing or blessing from the experience, whether it’s a private, group session or a speaking event.
Whatever the message is that I’ve conveyed I am somehow reminded of how it applies to me as well and it guides me towards the next stage of my growth.
Being aware of the subtle messages that are being sent to guide us forward is very empowering.
Last weekend at the Soul Full Day conference, I guided a group of 70 women through a visualization meditation to identify and let go of a fear story holding them back from what they truly wanted for their life, freedom to live their love story.
It was remarkable to witness them releasing the fear and claiming their love stories, seeing and feeling themselves living in the higher potential of their dreams.
This week I’ve been deeply reminded of the fear story that I’ve been carrying, ‘not being well enough to live a fulfilling life because my digestive health is failing’.
This is the same story my grandmother carried, and she died in fear with this story in her which was unconsciously passed on to me, and I accepted it.
For 8 years now I’ve been having various challenges with my digestive health. I’ve seen many different professionals and tried many different remedies and lifestyle changes. Some have worked and some haven’t. Over time things seemed to have mostly settled, then just a month ago the issues flared up again in a bigger way.
This brought up the old fear story for me as I prepare for a trip of a lifetime. I’m going to Egypt on a sacred pilgrimage to the visit the lands and ancient sites with 13 other women. This will be my first trip overseas and I’ve always been fascinated with Egyptian history, never thinking I would get the opportunity to visit until it showed up to me. I was very drawn to go, and decided I was going, even though it felt way outside my ability to be able to take such a trip.
Worries and a wide range of emotions have been coming up for me since these flare ups have been happening. My mind races and makes up stories based in old fears.
What if I am not well enough to fully experience this trip? What if I am stuck in my room and miss the tours, or what if I am not able to digest the food there? All that disappointment and money spent if I might not be able to full experience it.
These stories are very similar to what my grandmother used to tell herself. She was afraid to go far from home, let alone on a plane to another country. Everything centred around her digestive limitations and she was petrified of having an ‘accident’ while out in public. These fear stories debilitated her and she became a hermit and was very lonely in her later years.
I will never forget seeing her in the final days of her life living in fear. I visited her almost every day and seeing her like that was very sad because there wasn’t much I could do other than comfort and reassure her that she would be ok.
What it did do was motivate me to face my own fears and not go down the same path as she did. In this regard, she was a great teacher to me and not long after she transitioned I was divinely guided to take the Radical Forgiveness Master Coach 10 day training in Atlanta.
It was a huge step for me, and again way outside my comfort zone, but in the end it was one of the best things I could have done for myself because it set me on the trajectory of facing my fears, and the journey of living my love story.
I am eternally grateful to be on this path of self-forgiveness and self-acceptance just as I am, and in time I have learned to love myself. I’m still on this healing journey however this year I’ve had some major shifts in this area of my life and feel truly worthy and deserving of this love for myself because I have freedom from the fears.
This is where the synchronicity comes in again.
It just so happens that this Friday, the day I fly to Egypt, is the 9 year anniversary of my grandmother’s passing, and it’s a full moon! You just can’t make these things up. I didn’t realize the mysterious alignment of these dates until just a few weeks ago.
In numerology the number 9 represents endings and completions and I have a strong intuitive feeling that this trip is going to be transformational for me as a new beginning.
The other day when I was dancing my grandmother came to my mind, she was dancing with me, and I know she is leaving me these breadcrumb signs to follow to complete this stage of my journey. I made a promise to her that I was going to end the cycle of fear she carried and commit myself to healing into wholeness.
I have no doubt that this is all happening for me, rather than to me. And unlike my grandmother, I will face my fears and take this trip and I will trust in the divine unfoldment of it all.
I am reminded that everything is always working out for me, even if it doesn’t seem that way and she is cheering me on all along the way.
These are the same phrases I spoke to the women when I was on stage just a few days ago and they echo loudly in my mind as the beautiful blessings of having the freedom to live my love story.
If you would like to experience the guided visualization for yourself listen to the audio recording so you too can be free from your fear story and claim your love story.
In my next blog I will share about my travel adventures so stay tuned, and if you would like to be notified when I share it you can join my email Love Letter list at the bottom of this page.
Until next time… thank you for being here.
very good
Thank you!
This is one of the best life lessons i have come across in this world; to learn to live one’s life happily by being yourself.
Thank you so much
It’s a wonderful lesson indeed! Thank you for your comment Patrick.
It seemed as though you were writing about me ????
Hi Radhika, thanks for your comment. I’m glad it resonated with you. 🙂
Love the way you write ✍️
We should all be living radical lives!
I’ve kind of always gone to the beat of my own drum…I suppose I was a late bloomer in doing that, ( a bit). I mean I got married and I really loved the guy, but when he screwed around on me while he was on the road for 10 years, it broke my heart. When he finally asked me for a divorce, I said sure, OK. I was so sick of it. I’m finally getting my own power back again, and learning to live under my own set of ‘rules’. And by rules I’m just going with the flow (pretty much) and using my intuition to guide me. I’m letting love & kindness rule the day, every day. (or I try to). I finally figured out the doctors are indeed “just practicing” and you have to figure out your own body and listen to your own body, to figure out what’s going right or wrong. You’re the only one that’s truly going to fix your self, and that goes for your body and your mind.
I hope to get back into my art which was photography, as a career for the rest of my life…
( we’ll see – I might be a writer who knows.) I just want to live a healthy life, workout a bit, & and cook really healthy stuff that tastes good too.
At 60, I feel like I’ve really come back into myself. I can’t wait to live the rest of my life, with my own ‘rules’, – hopefully with a soulmate & partner to explore this beautiful world with.
Thank you Noreen for sharing, I love hearing stories of reclaiming our power! Sounds like you are on the right track for you and it’s great that you are listening to your body and intuition for direction. Cheers to making our own rules! 🙂